Tuesday, February 26, 2008
guess who's still alive
Yeah, like it's Omri's getting locked up that is marring Papa Arik's 80th...
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
Shas files, tectonic edition
The recent earthquake that was felt across Israel was the result of the "homosexual activity practiced in the country", Knesset Member Shlomo Benizri said Wednesday.Ynet.
Sunday, February 17, 2008
Saturday, February 16, 2008
גברותיי ורבותיי, מהפך
Begin: Shalom, My wife and I have a reservation in the penthouse suite.
Clerk: Name please?
Begin: Begin - Menachem and Aliza.
Clerk: Okay, let me check my list...ah, yes, Mr. Begin...there's a bit of a problem...
Begin: Yes?
Clerk: Well, we aren't allowed to rent you the penthouse suite.
Begin: Did that Boutros Boutros Boutros fellow already take it?
Clerk: No, it's not that...
Begin: Well, we have a reservation! This is an outrage! Let me speak with the management!
Clerk: Sir, it's exactly that: the management think you pose a security threat to our hotel.
Begin: A security threat?! How is that possible, you already have staying here the man who brought this country on the brink of annihilation just four years ago...
Clerk: Indeed, but President Sadat he didn't blow up this hotel!
Friday, February 15, 2008
All in the Family
One look at this AP photo and this still of Meathead portrayer Rob Reiner as "rockumentarian" Marty DiBergi in This Is Spinal Tap says it all:
Which one is now reposing with seventy virgins?
Thursday, February 14, 2008
I'd like to be under the sea
The Zionist-as-octopus motif might have something to it. The Octopus is a clever hunter, can adapt well to its surroundings, and can survive even after losing limbs. After all, isn't the whole idea of Zionism for the Jews to have a garden paradise "below the storm, in a little hideaway beneath the waves...knowing that they're happy and they're safe...with no one there to tell (them) what to do." There you are: one hundred and twenty years of Zionist ideology boiled down to one song off Abbey Road.
Wednesday, February 13, 2008
Pieces of flair
“Everyone here is thirsting for American brands, it’s that simple,” said Mehdi Mortazavi, who is helping create Friday’s, a restaurant in
The Islamic Republic is a good fucking time.
Oriental gaze in the sports section
Tzphoney
“Coming towards us from the opposite direction was a sleek new gray Jaguar with
I rapped Gal's helmet with my knuckles and shouted into his ear, "Did you see that?! That was a car from
"Oh yeah," he shouted nonchalantly, "Rich Jordanians drive over all the time. They stay at the Dan Panorama [a five-star hotel] and go shopping at the new mall in Ramat Aviv."”
Sometimes while biking through I like to imagine what Meir Yaari would say about the boulevard named in his honor. Today’s guess: “Look at these yuppies with their high-tech jobs, pure-bread puppies, and SUVs. They don’t even hire the proletarian ‘new Jew’ from the other side of the Yarqon to clean their houses or walk their parents (?!); they bring in people from Arab villages and who knows where in southeast Asia!” Except old Meir might say
***
The good news is that it’s impossible for us to be gentrifying a neighbourhood like this. In Ramat Aviv, young, creative types like us are more likely to be decreasing the neighbours’ property value. Forget being Bohemian in Florentine. We’re living the true revolutionary lifestyle—nudging the bourgeois out of Tel Aviv’s upper west side.
Or maybe we’re just full of shit?