Monday, April 28, 2008

Ayatollah Magorium's Islamic Emporium

An Iranian official is launching a campaign against Western toys. "Undoubtedly," says Prosecutor General Ghorban Najafabadi, "the personality and identity of the new generation and our children, as a result of unrestricted importation of toys, has been put at risk and caused irreparable damages."

As you can imagine, the Western media is having a field day with this. Nevermind though that yesterday's Washington Post ran a piece exclaiming how an American TV show toppled the Soviet Union. After all, "popular culture...is every bit as important as chin-stroking politics in fomenting real social change". The article goes on to point out other examples of "throwaway cultural products influence far-flung cultures in ways that are impossible to predict or control".

For example, you'll see the effects of Dungeons and Dragons on the Iranian constitution when Najafabadi's letter is discussed by the Council of Guardians or the Assembly of Experts...

Free Tibet (Made in China)

Check the label.

It's like when I bought my Israeli flag from a Syrian...

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

unless you've been living under a rock

Wondering why Hillary won't drop out already, Barack Obama tries to convince her with baby face...

and enlists blonde baby at diner bar, irate at lack of results (and milk shake).

Thou blind Pharisee

1950: Law of Return rules "every Jew" has the right to move to Israel

1962: Supreme Court rules Jews who convert to other religions forfeit their aliyah rights

1970: Amendment to Law of Return extends aliyah rights to the children, grandchildren, spouses, and spouses of children and granchildren of Jews

This just in from the Supreme Court: Converts to other religions can make aliyah if they are children, grandchildren, spouses, or spouses of children and grandchildren of Jews (ref. 1970), only if they are not the offspring of Jewish mothers.

Monday, April 21, 2008

Take that, Walt and Mearsheimer!

Canadian Gregory Levey relates his experience voting in the UN for Israel in Salon. It's fascinating (and disturbing), have a read:

I knew that Israel usually voted along with the Americans, its closest ally and supporter. And since there were no Israelis around to tell me what to do, I figured that I might as well just ask the Americans....

"Um, yeah," I said, drawing out my words awkwardly and almost stuttering. "I'm, uh, representing  Israel at this meeting...I just wanted to know if you would mind telling me how you guys were going to vote."

...he whispered, "We're voting no."

Our huddle broke then, and I fought the urge to give the American diplomats a high-five.

Clash of Congregations

"Israeli police had to break up a fist fight that erupted between Greek and Armenian Orthodox clergymen at one of Christianity's holiest sites. The scuffles broke out at the Church of the Holy Sepulchre in Jerusalem on Orthodox Palm Sunday...When police arrived to break up the fight, some were reportedly beaten back by worshippers using palm fronds."

Don't you guys have big enough accounts to settle with the Turks than to be fighting eachother...with leaves!?!?

Hmm

Haaretz:
Police on Monday afternoon arrested a 27-year-old yeshiva student for undressing in a Bat Yam supermarket, wearing only a sock to cover his genitals, to protest a recent controversial court ruling which permitted the sale of chametz in some businesses.
Uhhh... ok.

Sunday, April 6, 2008

core-rcion values

It is not very often that we at YeshMatzav will criticize a liberal Haaretz writer for saying the kinds of callous and ridiculous statements that usually are blogworthy. Please check the skies tonight where you are for a blue moon or flying pigs.

Commenting on the hametz debate, Yair Sheleg gives "a resounding yes to prohibiting commerce on the Sabbath or the sale of chametz during Pesach". Sheleg is clearly going for shock value, but he crosses the line. The main argument is that certain Jewish religious laws have become defining cultural practices among "even completely secular Israelis" and that as such are "core values deserving of legal protection".

However, the factual inaccuracy, poverty of logic, and implications of religious coercion that are saturated within Sheleg's argument are not the reason for this posting. The inciting remark is when Sheleg asserts "if there were no core values deserving of legal protection, then there would be no basis for destroying the grand monument in Kiryat Arba to Baruch Goldstein, who in 1994 massacred 29 Arab worshipers in Hebron." Really? How about that the sanctity of human life and prevention of genocidal murder might be more "core" than a Biblical injunction against consuming animals who don't ruminate? More importantly, a monument to a hate criminal is incitement to further hate crimes. It's not baloney!

Friday, April 4, 2008

ביעור חמץ

Wikipedia:
Bi'ur: burning one's chametz. All appropriate methods of destruction are included in this category. On the night preceding the 14th of Nisan, a formal search of the house known as bedikat chametz ("search for chametz") is conducted by candlelight. The chametz found in this search is burned the next morning in a formal bi'ur ceremony.
Haaretz on Shas, without any explanations:
Minister of Religious Services Yitzhak Cohen (Shas) announced yesterday that he plans to appeal a Jerusalem court decision allowing grocery stores, restaurants and pizzerias to sell chametz (leavened bread) on Passover.

"The court must rule on what it knows, and not halakha (Jewish religious law). The court's ruling points a gun to the head of the Jewish people," he said. We must get rid of the court like we get rid of chametz, he added.
Is that funny? I don't think so. But what the heck.

בשתן וצואה יהודה תקום

The shit hits the fan, literally.

Thursday, April 3, 2008

YNet's Back Pages

"As it is said: one thousand Arabs are not worth even one yeshiva boy," says former Sephardic Chief Rabbi Mordechai Eliyahu to grieving students at the Mercaz HaRav Yeshiva. Of course, there is nothing new in inciting and racist statements by former Sephardic chief rabbis...

What is interesting though is that this Eliyahu quote was the front page story on the Hebrew YNet site, but not found at all on the English site. No way, such a Shonde fur die Goyim is too Ashkenazic for the Shas voters!